Shane's Superhero Showdown Round 1

11/19/2015

The Mediocre Movie Club kicks off Season 3 with Shane's Superhero Showdown. Feel free to vote and chime in the comments. Round 2 whenever, cause, you know, man, everybody.

16 Comments

Sean

11/19/2015 05:15:32 pm

Was "Batman" the Michael Keaton original or the Adam West version?

Bryan

11/19/2015 05:30:13 pm

Ask Shane

Jon

11/19/2015 06:22:26 pm

Keaton version. I have to assume the Adam West version is having a drink with Blade Trinity somewhere, safe in the knowledge that they're the pinnacle of the genre.

Shane

11/19/2015 07:00:49 pm

Jon is correct.

Drew

11/19/2015 05:38:34 pm

XMen: First Class was seeded way too low.

Sean

11/19/2015 06:36:34 pm

Maybe he should've seeded based on RT%. 87 for First Class

Shane

11/19/2015 07:01:55 pm

I like First Class, but this is a pretty tough list. Iron Man is a pretty brutal first round match up.

Shane

11/19/2015 07:05:34 pm

Even looking at RT (which I didn't do before), only Keaton Batman seems out of place being above First Class.

Sean

11/19/2015 07:39:05 pm

i only looked at 1st class. What's the average tomatometer score in the 16

Joe

11/19/2015 07:57:04 pm

Blade is dumb, and I think I've watched like 3 of these.

Bobby

11/19/2015 10:48:33 pm

That's okay, uninformed voting is your American right!

Shane

11/20/2015 01:56:34 pm

Ok. Long post here, but I wanted to inform you of what movies you should be picking in the first round of this tournament. A lot of you have opinions, but until I tell you what the correct opinion is, you’re misinformed to the point of laughable ignorance. Without my expert guidance, watching you select the movies above is like watching a baby try a lemon for the first time or watching Ben Carson trying to find Laos on a globe.

#1 The Dark Knight (94% on Rotten Tomatoes) v. #16 Watchmen (65% on RT)
No chance for an upset here as even a giant blue penis isn’t enough to get anyone that excited about Watchmen. Really, there are probably a few other movies that most jokers would say should have been in the 16 spot, but I think Watchmen was underrated. Was it a bit slow? Sure. But at least there were some stakes. Anyway, The Dark Knight cruises here.
#2 Avengers (92% on RT) v. #15 Captain America: The First Avenger (79% on RT)
Two movies I’ve never seen, so I’m going on reputation. I was never an Avengers fan and Captain America is bland in comics. He’s basically the Superman of Marvel. So I imagine it’s hard to come up with a good story for Cap. If I’m gonna watch a Chris Evans movie tonight, I’ll probably rewatch the first 2/3rds of Sunshine or Snowpiercer. Avengers cruises.
#3 Superman (1978) (93% on RT) v. #14 Blade (54% on RT)
Here we have our first upset of the tournament. It’s probably sacrilege, but let’s face it: Superman is the most boring Superhero this side of Cardboard Man, whose only powers are breaking himself down and storing books in his bowels and then sitting in my attic for 4 years. Not only is Supes a boring character, we have a 70’s movie with 70’s style slow pacing. Blade brought us Wesley Fucking Snipes and killing jackoff vampires to techno music. Plus, Stephen Dorff was never better. Blade takes the victory.
#4 Guardians of the Galaxy (91% on RT) v. #13 X2: X-Men United (86% on RT)
Guardians was one of my favorite movies of 2015 and I would never argue with anyone who said it was the best comic book superhero movie of all time. On the other hand, the X-Men are the best mainstream comic book creation out there. This is largely due to Wolverine, a character that Jackman completely owns. But the early X-Men movies are not great and I think the 86% on RT is a result of how awful the first X-Men movie was. Guardians was more creative and had a perfect balance of comedy and action without suffering from getting corny. Guardians is the pick here.
#5 Iron Man (94% on RT) v. #12 X-Men: First Class (87% on RT)
Maybe X-Men First Class is underrated here, but it’s merely a solidly good movie. By most accounts, Avengers is the best comic book team movie out there. I wish X-Men had done the same method the Avengers did: Bust out a bunch of solo projects and then bring them together. That would have been pretty sexy. Instead, First Class can’t match the Avengers approach of characterization and loses. Avengers ftw.
#6 Spiderman (89% on RT) v. #11 Ant Man (80% on RT)
Spider-Man 3 was so bad that we all forget how good Spider-Man was. Seriously, Spider-Man 3 is one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen in the theatre. It’s right there with Godzilla (the one with Broderick where Godzilla fights a giant can of Pepsi) and The Wild Wild West. Just awful. I haven’t seen Ant Man yet, but I feel like its success is based on Paul Rudd being adorable and a pretty weak summer for action movies outside of Mad Max: Fury Road. We’ll go chalk and Spider-Ma takes the W.
#7 X-Men: Days of Future Past (91% on RT) v. #10 Captain America: Winter Soldier (89% on RT)
I’ve given my thoughts on both of these subjects. Cap is inherently boring and the X-Men are inherently interesting. Days of Future Past avoids the failure of other X-Me movies and gives us a story with some strong character building mixed in with enough light moments to keep the movie balanced. I haven’t seen Winter Soldier yet, but I get the feeling it can’t matchup here. Days of Future Past is who you should have picked.
#8 Batman (1989) (72% on RT) v. #9 Batman Begins (85% on RT)
Michael Keaton is my third favorite Batman. Gasp! You and I both know its true. Bale is clearly the best Batman. He’s brooding, arrogant like a proper rich kid and looks the part. Kilmer is number two for the same reasons, though he doesn’t pull of the physicality or quiet anger quite the same as Bale (It’s not Kilmer’s fault that storyline was awful, even though it was way better than Batman Returns). Keaton is just too affable. He’s not a bad Batman, indeed he’s great. But that shows just how good this franchise has been done by Hollywood. Bale’s superior Batman takes the day.

Bryan

11/20/2015 03:41:14 pm

Ant Man's special effects are incredible. Paul Rudd does little to help or hurt the movie. It's a mindless enjoyable Superhero movie.

Jon

11/20/2015 03:59:14 pm

Captain America, as imagined in the Marvel movies, is no Superman. The First Avenger is all about him gaining power after a lifetime of lacking it, and then taking the knowledge of what it's like to be bullied into WWII. It completely works, and is the rare superhero movie that gets me in the feels. The Winter Soldier is maybe the most nuanced superhero movie of the recent past, while also having a lot of contemporary themes about surveillance and government power. Cap himself has to struggle with what it means to be the symbol of something that has become warped from its original nobility, and how easy it is for power to transform from benevolent to malevolent. You're right to be skeptical about a Marvel Superman, which is what Cap could've been, but both of Cap's movies were probably my favorites of the non-team Marvel movies, until Guardians came along, that is.

Bryan

11/20/2015 09:20:45 pm

Captain America is the New England Patriots.

It's still a thing to not like them, right?

Sean

11/23/2015 05:40:13 pm

Jon is right about the themes of Captain America but not so much about whether they're good to great movies. Chris Evans is still a stiff. Your main character being your worst actor is bad for movies.

Shane's Superhero Showdown Round 1

Leave a Reply.

Games

Categories